how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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