Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
