is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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