People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize