Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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