She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
