And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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