I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
