What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
