He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
