dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
