That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
only you would photoshop your dick
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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