oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
