Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
