so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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