I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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