I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
