I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Randomize