no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
All the doctor said was why
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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