Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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