Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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