Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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