For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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