i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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