That's intense
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
