And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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