Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize