this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize