Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
