ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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