I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize