can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize