so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
