I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
