plz talk dirty to me
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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