I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
