yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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