I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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