Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize