Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
