Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
