New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
they're like a gay fantastic four
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
