Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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