Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
