My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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