Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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