is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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