On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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