no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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