I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize